Pootie Tang in Cartagena, Brasilia, El Salvador…

Dame mi dinero!

Pootie's Brazilian 'babe'?

Some folks in Washington are “fumando lumpias.”

Republican Senator Chuck Grassley of Iowa, interviewed by Radio Iowa, thinks that Russian spies disguised as Colombian nocturnal “escorts” in Cartagena could have entrapped the 24 charter members of the Pootie Tang Fan Club chapters at the Secret Service and DoD.

“We’re looking at something that is very, very serious when national security might not be protected properly. Who knows who might be using prostitutes? The Russians are famous for that to get information out of us,” Grassley told Radio Iowa.

The 12 Secret Service agents and 12 military personnel are accused of bringing prostitutes back to their hotel before President Barack Obama’s trip to Cartagena, Colombia, earlier this month.

But this is less about prostitution than the president’s safety, Grassley added.

Come again? El senador esta fumando una lumpia.

Give a poor Cartagena working girl a break, sir.

This is about the Pootie Tang wannabe – y’know, the still unidentified secret service agent who after apparently consuming copious quantities of alcohol hired an escort to spend the rest of the night in his hotel room, which probably cost US taxpayers at least $300 a night.

The morning after, Pootie Tang wannabe tried to shortchange his shortlived “girlfriend” by offering her $47 instead of the $850 fee that had been agreed to before she left the nightclub with her new gringo friend.

Was it Pootie Tang’s own money, or part of the per diem advance US government officials get when they travel abroad on official business? If the latter, it was taxpayer money.

The offended lady, who later told some reporters that her $850 fee for an overnight “revuelco” with the now-he’s-not-so-nice gringo makes her a high-end escort and not a hooker, stood her ground.

“Dame mi dinero,” she said, loudly and insistently enough that hotel management and the Colombian police were quickly involved.

Then someone had the bright idea of calling the US Embassy to report that Pootie Tang was shortchanging a working girl and, y’know, that’s illegal in Colombia.

Prostitution is legal and regulated in Colombia, confined to certain areas and businesses, and also taxed by the government. Taxpayers have rights in Colombia.

“Dame mi dinero,” the young lady said.

In the end, Ms Dania Suarez only was paid $225 or 26.4% of the previously agreed fee for mutually consensual sex.

What cheap, “Ugly American” behavior. What a dumbass.

Of the 12 Secret Service agents involved in the scandal, 6 have resigned, 2 are being fired, 3 have been cleared of serious wrongdoing, and 1 has retired.

Investigations against 12 military personnel continue. By the time everything is wrapped up officially, some bean counters in DC think that US taxpayers could be in the hole for at least $2 million in investigation-related costs thanks to Pootie Tang in Cartagena.

But it could get worse. Some of the Secret Service agents that were fired or resigned reportedly are having second thoughts and plan to sue to get their jobs back. More costs borne by taxpayers.

Meanwhile, Dania Suarez reportedly is in hiding in fear that the wannabe Pootie Tang’s gringo friends now want to kill her.

The real Pootie Tang would say, “I gots to say na nay no.”

Updated on 26 April:

The US Secret Service, FBI, DEA, Marine Corps and embassies apparently facilitate/tolerate/turn an official blind eye to the regular deployment of Pootie Tang fan club members everywhere in Latin America – presumably all at US taxpayer expense.

In El Salvador:


Following are several paragraphs from Chis HAlsne’s report for KIROTV:

“Seattle-based Investigative Reporter Chris Halsne (KIROTV- CBS- COX MEDIA GROUP) just returned from El Salvador, where he interviewed a U.S. government subcontractor who worked extensively with the Secret Service advance team (snipers, K-9 and explosives sweeps) in San Salvador prior to President Obama’s trip there in March of 2011.”

“The eyewitness says he joined about a dozen Secret Service agents and a few U.S. military specialists at a strip club in San Salvador a few days before President Obama and his family arrived in El Salvador to meet with its new president, Mauricio Funes.”

“This source witnessed the majority of the men drink heavily (“wasted,” “heavily intoxicated”) at the strip club. He says most of the Secret Service “advance-team” members also paid extra for access to the VIP section of the club where they were provided a number of sexual favors in return for their cash. Although our source says he told the agents it was a “really bad idea” to take the strippers back to their hotel rooms, several agents bragged that they “did this all the time” and “not to worry about it.” Our source says at least two agents had escorts check into their rooms. It is unclear whether the escorts who returned to the hotels were some of the strippers from the same club.”

In Brazil…(Caracas Gringo is told by Brazilian news sources that the argument described below happened as a result of a “misunderstanding” about gender.)


From the Daily Mail article:

“American marines injured a Brazilian prostitute after throwing her out of an official Embassy car, it was reported today. Romilda Ferreira was left with a broken collar bone, two broken ribs and a punctured lung after the incident in Brazil’s capital Brasilia. The three marines on a U.S. Embassy security team, and an Embassy staff member, were pulled out of the country before police were able to press charges, according to Brazil’s Jornal Nacional programme.”

“This latest incident, which happened in November last year, came to light after U.S. Defense Secretary Leon Panetta, in Brazil during a Latin American tour, was questioned about it by a Brazilian reporter during a press conference. According to a Brazilian police investigation, the four U.S. Embassy officials had visited a nightclub in the centre of Brasilia where they had hired a group of prostitutes.”

“Police investigating the incident requested the arrest of the driver of the van and one of the marines for bodily injury and failure to rescue. But U.S. authorities removed the four men – three Marines and a US Embassy staff member – from the country before they could be charged with the crimes.” (Caracas Gringo’s comment: In Brazil and the US this is called cover up, felony flight from law enforcement, and obstruction of justice, but the perpetrators had diplomatic immunity.)

“One of the Americans and at least one woman left the club by taxi, but Ms Ferreira and another woman got into an official U.S. Embassy van with the other three men. As they pulled away there was a discussion about how much the women were to be paid, and one of the marines pushed Ms Ferreira out of the car, where she ended up being run over by the vehicle. Speaking to the Jornal Nacional news programme, Romilda said she tried to hold on to the door but was dragged under the wheels. She said: ‘I tried to get up and grabbed the doorknob. That was when they told the driver to go. Then I felt my leg burning. I let go and fell underneath the van. I hit my head and passed out.’ Ms. Ferreira, who is still recovering from her injuries, reportedly is now suing the US federal government” (i.e. US taxpayers).

About Caracas Gringo

Representing less than 0.00000000001515152% of the world population as of 31 December 2011.
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5 Responses to Pootie Tang in Cartagena, Brasilia, El Salvador…

  1. Al says:

    Thanks Gringo for some excellent reporting. I have to wonder about the girl in Cartagena. What type of working girl stays for the night without getting her money upfront? Also, doesn’t say much for our “heroic” Secret Service men and their ability to maneuver in tough situations. And $850 for a gal in Cartagena what does that say?

    Seems to me these heroes of ours are living large on our dime. I was in Montevideo in 2006 when Bush Junior arrived. The Uruguayan papers said anywhere from 1,200 to 1,500 military personnel to protect Junior. All the hotels in downtown were filled with Americans from the five-star chain hotels to the three-star regulars. A battleship with Seal teams was positioned off the coast. Not a word in the American press appeared about this extravagant deployment.


  2. Kepler says:

    Some US representatives are saying she might not be a Russian agent after all, but a Chinese one: she or another of the ladies were heard to be called “china” by one of the locals.

    Caracas Gringo reply: LOL


  3. Lobo says:

    Let me know how… Caracas Gringo reply: Sent a message, but your server blocked it.


  4. Lobo says:

    Gringo you are a nut, i love it. Agree, stupid ‘secret service’ guy had no idea what he was getting into. And what about providing some cultural orientation training prior to these ‘missions’ so the super agents understand the customs of the countries they are visting. Should have just paid, Diana looks worth it. Although I imagine he had only 47 bucks in his wallet.


  5. Roberto N says:


    Final cost $2 million?

    Damn, that is some expensive Pootie Tang!

    Na Guara!


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